Oral Sex: Tongue Tips for Men

No matter how good the sexual experience, anybody is always open to even better sex – and men should know that while a healthy penis is essential for sexual satisfaction, sometimes a woman may desire a little extra something from another body part: the tongue. Even men who are cunnilingual enthusiasts may not be as expert at giving oral sex as they may think. So, without neglecting the prime attention to penis care which a man needs, he should also spend some time learning how to use his tongue to better advantage with a few sex tips.

It’s not all about the vagina.

When a man thinks about oral sex with a woman, his thoughts pretty much focus on the vagina and stay there.

In fact, as pleasurable as oral attention to the vagina is, a woman usually enjoys a little attention elsewhere. A guy should start where he’s got the greatest experience: the mouth. Engaging in some long, loving kisses is pretty much guaranteed to be a good start. But if it’s agreed that a guy is going to be dedicating himself to orally pleasuring a woman, he should also move beyond mere kissing. Running the tongue sensually along a partner’s lips or gently, lightly nibbling on the lips can be quite erotic for some women.

From the lips, move on to other areas of the body as one works one’s way down. For example, kissing the nape or lingering at the earlobes can be very arousing. And definitely spend a nice long time kissing, licking and – if this can be done with enough sensitivity – lightly nibbling the breasts and nipples.

But it still is a lot about the vagina.

All of this is important, but it’s still a preliminary to engaging orally with the vagina. Keep these tips in mind while demonstrating your expertise with your tongue:

– Start slowly. The clitoris is keenly sensitive, and it may take a few minutes for it to become acclimated to a guy’s ministrations. A man shouldn’t dive in with all he has; rather, he should slowly warm it up. It’s important to take one’s time and to move one’s tongue slowly around the entire clitoris. (Remember: some of it is hidden under the “hood,” so don’t just concentrate on what is visible.)

– Take breaks. Let the clitoris have a few moments to adjust, especially in the beginning. Transfer attentions to the pubic mound or to the thighs, and then return to the “main event” again. But be judicious in taking breaks: Once the appropriate rhythm is established, it will be frustrating if a man sneaks away, even for a minute.

– Commit to it. Once it is clear that one’s partner has become wholly engaged, the man needs to make a strong commitment to bringing her maximum pleasure. One method which often brings about the most pleasure for a woman is when, after the vulva has been warmed up, the man places his mouth open around a wide area and creates a kind of “suction seal.” Sucking gently but committedly while at the same time allowing the tongue to flicker back and forth (paying special attention to the clitoris) is often the best way to bring about a memorable orgasm.

Giving oral sex to one’s partner is a marvelous way to show one cares – and it very often leads to a reciprocal effort on her part.

Of course, if a guy wants oral sex (or better sex of any kind), it helps if he presents a healthy penis; after all, no woman wants to put in her mouth an organ that doesn’t look appealing. Regular use of a top-notch penis health creme (health professionals recommend Man1 Man Oil) can help address many common penis health issues. For example, a man whose manhood carries a strong (and not pleasant) odor may benefit from a crème with vitamin A. This crucial vitamin has anti-bacterial properties which may eliminate persistent penile odor. Men with a cracked, wrinkled look to their penis skin need a crème that also contains a potent antioxidant like alpha lipoic acid. This can defuse the oxidative processes that make member look prematurely aged.

Male Sexual Arousal – How Lap Dances and Strip Clubs Affect Male Sexual Desire, Arousal and Behavior

A man has been lying to his wife. For months he has been secretly going out at night to exotic dance clubs, hobnobbing with strippers, and getting lap dances (which he chooses to believe are “innocent” and “harmless”). He has been enjoying his own secret little world that brings him a sense of sensual arousal and illicit overall body pleasure. He tells himself he is “not cheating.” Inevitably however, after some indefinite amount of time, his wife discovers what he has been doing. To his surprise, dismay and disappointment, his spouse is not so receptive or accepting. She is enraged, furious, hurt, devastated and maybe even feeling and behaving out of control. He may be at risk of losing everything – his marriage, his home, and his family.

At this point, the man often feels, “I’ve got to find a way to turn this around. I am attracted to my wife. I love her dearly. She’s beautiful. She’s been good to me. She takes good care of our children. I don’t want a divorce. I want to find a way to make it up to her. I thought I was being real ‘cool’ going to these clubs. I realize now how immature I was.”

Then, the question arises: Why have you been going to see strippers? Why are you paying for lap dances when you have a beautiful wife at home, who you say you love?

The answer, if the man is being honest, sometimes goes like this. “I’m attracted to my wife, but she expects me to “perform” for her or she expects me to always initiate sex. She thinks I don’t desire her because I have not been so interested in being intimate with her lately. Truth is, I’m sometimes afraid of her. She expects me to always be ready and to satisfy her. Lately, she gets angry if I fall short of her expectations – especially since she knows I have received gratification from some of these other women.”

So what is it about strip clubs, strippers and lap dances that causes some men to eagerly return for more while neglecting his readily available wife who he claims to love?

A typical male response might be: “At the dance clubs, I can relax, be myself, have a few drinks, listen to music and watch some beautiful bodies moving slowly, seducing me into a state of arousal. I might invite one of these beautiful young ladies to my table. She might smile at me, perhaps touching my arm, or whispering something seductive into my ear. She might call me honey or baby, offering to make me feel good if I want to dance with her.”

At home, when it comes to sexual desire, some men will say, “I often feel like a frightened child about to be scolded by his angry mother.” They might share that at the club they have sometimes overheard other men say: “I have to go home and do my old lady,” as if it is some chore or drudgery to get through, instead of the pleasurable experience that true intimacy can be.

What do strippers and exotic dancers do that men are craving but not receiving at home?

First, the man is totally receiving. There is nothing he has to do but be there. The woman does all the flirting and seducing. She moves her body seductively. She may gradually remove some of her clothing. She may arch her back and stick her butt out, “an acceptance position” known to trigger sexual arousal in male mammals. Some strippers will not touch the guys at all, but will come very close to touching the men’s faces with her breasts, her crotch, her butt, etc. However, most strippers will touch and do allow touching, even if they are technically not supposed to. It is all about what will make them the most money. Then there are the special “Champagne rooms.” For a very high hourly fee, a man can spend some time in a very private room with the woman of his choice. Here, she may offer additional sexual favors that she claims to only provide for “special” customers.

Second, the exotic dancer’s goal is to stimulate the man, tease him, act as if he is a master at arousing her, and to continually promise him greater and greater pleasure. She makes no demands, appears to have no expectations of him, and gives him no arguments. But there is also no real back and forth communication (except allowing him to voice his unhappiness and frustrations with his life, his marriage or whatever) and there is no love. Sometimes a man begins to feel “love” for an exotic dancer, but what he love is only the image she is presenting and the way she is pleasing him. He most probably doesn’t have a clue about who she really is.

The truth about exotic dancers is this. The girl is there to: support a habit, support her family, earn some money for a specific goal, or as a quick fix for an uneducated, unskilled woman to earn a hefty sum of money. This is a recession proof business – and it is a business, big business. Men have needs, and when times get tough, these needs are often exacerbated. Some men will seek a way to escape and feel good, even if only for a few hours.

Behind their smiles, erotic movements, and seductive words, many of these women actually feel disgust for the men. They don’t like the way these men “get off” on total strangers. They despise the men for “cheating” on their spouses and significant others.
And their only goal is to get as much money as they possibly can by keeping each man aroused and coming back for more.

The man who frequents strip clubs is getting his own narcissistic needs met for attention, arousal, stimulation and praise. He is actually depriving himself of the opportunity for true intimacy, closeness, communication and unraveling of his deepest childhood fears and insecurities. His wife suffers from that same lack of intimacy.

The solution is for each partner to take responsibility for the demise of their intimacy, to take the bull by the horn, to dig in their heels, to get the sexual counseling they can both benefit from, and to literally start their sexual relationship all over again. Literally, beginning all over, they ought to shake hands and say, “Hi. My name is…. I can offer you something wonderful, make you feel better than you have ever felt before, if you will only spend the time to get to know me….”

Basic Health Tips for Women in Busy Times Part II

As I promised in my first part of my original article titled Basic Health Tips for Women in Busy Times. Here is part two on my tips on how to remain healthy using some common sense tips.

6. Avoid stress. Yes, it is difficult to do sometimes. Life just seems to have stress around every corner. But we can take some common sense actions to help reduce our stress. Stay away from “toxic” friends. The kind of friends that just seem to create drama in your life that would never be there if you were not friends in the first place. Their problems become your problems. Try not to become inundated with 24 hour news. Yes, you should be an informed citizen, but you don’t have to watch depressing news over and over again. Get informed and switch the channel. Women especially are prone to too much stress in their lives. Stress has been recognized as source of many sicknesses. Try as much as feasible to take time out to relax. Read a book, visit with friends and stay active. Take time to pamper yourself. And be certain to get sufficient sleep to restore your energy.

7. Beware of the sun! Women especially seem overly concerned with tanning. If you must tan, try one of the spray tanners. They even sell spray tanning cans at the store. I haven’t tried any of them myself. So, I can’t attest to their effectiveness, but you could try one if you just must have that tanned look. If you are going to be out in the sun, use sunscreen and wear a hat. You’ll look younger longer if you try to avoid over exposure to the sun.

8. Smile, you’re on candid camera! A beautiful smile just seems to give a person an added glow. And have you ever noticed how people with beautiful smiles tend to smile a lot? Smiling helps you get into a good mood. Be sure to visit your dentist to maintain that beautiful smile.

9. This is so obvious, but you must visit your Gynecologist. Women, who are over the age of eighteen ought to have their Physical Examination annually especially for the Pap Smear test. Women who are over forty should have their mammograms and the Breast self-exam is encouraged once puberty has been reached and should be a habit as they mature

10. I left this one for tenth, but it is certainly not the least. Remember to practice safe sex.

I hope these simple tips have been a reminder to you. As I stated at the outset I think that many women already are aware of these things. But, I think we all need reminders from time to time of things. I hope you will find these tips useful. Eat right, stay fit and try to live each day to the fullest.

Thanks for reading…